I had quit blogging almost a year ago but Chennai Express
happened and forced me to wear bloggers hat again.
Since its release, Indian audiences are constantly assaulted
with 8 digit revenue earned every day via newspapers, television, PR, radio,
online and most importantly by self proclaimed Bollywood trade analysts.
Chennai Express, a third grade script enacted by touted
Badshah of Bollywood is a well-marketed product aimed to get money out every
Indian including south, and voila, it succeeded!
This was an Eid release, a territory that gave a taste of
success to Salman Khan (back then, an ageing superstar and now a box office
star)
With this year being open slot, it was grabbed by desperate
Shah Rukh Khan.
Since Shah Rukh Khan is more like a “diplomatic &
tactical gorilla” of Bollywood, he managed to get all screens of our country
cleared of all the crap they were running (from Chennai Express team’s point of
view) only to screen his masterpiece. He also ensured that no other movie (Once
Upon a Time in Mumbai Dobaara) was to be released along with his masterpiece so;
Indians come to box office only to find no choice. Now, call this strategic marketing,
unfair monopoly, flexing muscle or dadagiri does not matter.
The film was released on Thursday, a day before its official
release i.e. Friday 9th of August 2013 only to be called as paid
preview (for chamchaas, die hard fans and paid reviewers to give more than 3.5
stars)
As the gates opened on Friday morning, entire Eid
celebrating audience (who ban watching TV during Ramadan) along with die-hard
fans discover that the tickets are priced at minimum INR. 500 - INR. 750. Well,
who cares its Chennai Express! Answer to Iron Man or Avengers kinnda crap that
Hollywood makes (yeah, right!)
Now if all these tactics are to be used and then proclaiming
to world that we minted 200 crores and soon will break the record for 3 idiots (Bollywood’s
highest grossing movie ever) then its very unfair comparison.
Unfair? Yes, unfair. It’s unfair to have Chennai Express top
that chart because then people start confusing and eventually believing that
minting money is proof of excellent product in our movie industry = “A Masterpiece”
and Chennai Express is no Masterpiece.
As far as I remember 3 idiots did not have to resort to this
cheap strategy, desperately mint money to show off. It was the content, the
acting (40+ playing 20 year old guy, hats off), the social connection and most
importantly – direction.
I don’t really want to, but lets re-think the story of the
movie. It is short and lame enough for a kid to memorize like some nursery
jingle, sad. Apparently, it’s not the story that supposedly glues audiences,
its either Deepike Padokone or the exorbitant ticket price they paid to find
movie 40% in Tamil with no sub-titles (how inconsiderate). Actually, lets not
forget Shah Rukh Khan!
And if you guys missed one of the WTF moment - why is Meena running to catch a train that
goes all the way to her village in stead of running away from it .. In the
opposite direction preferably?
I mean what was she hoping? She’d out run the “gundilog” and land safely in Chennai (presumably) without having that ridiculous village crowd stop the train mid way and take her to her “don-nah” appa??!! Or get off at Kalyan? or wherever and go Goa with SRK?
I mean what was she hoping? She’d out run the “gundilog” and land safely in Chennai (presumably) without having that ridiculous village crowd stop the train mid way and take her to her “don-nah” appa??!! Or get off at Kalyan? or wherever and go Goa with SRK?
Something that masses offer superstars is, you don't have to
act anymore. You can have your arrogant face, wearing attitude and deliver few
punch lines borrowed from some comedy show but since you are crowned a
superstar, masses prefer you telling those already heard punch lines in your
unique style (lame)
This is exactly what Shah Rukh does. Another character,
Deepika is so predictable and stereotyped that I started laughing the moment
she delivered her first line.
I found it extremely difficult to recall something in
Chennai Express that was a genuine attempt in making quality motion picture. I
think Indian audience does not look for that anymore. And the saddest part is,
when some director takes painful effort in going against all odds and making
masterpiece they don't make it to silver jubilee (deceased phenomenon) nor 100
crore club (new yard stick)
With kind of logic, I think Dil Chata Hai should have made
500 crores or declared all time flop/worst movie.
In this blog I am in no way comparing Chennai Express with 3
Idiots or both with Dil Chahta Hai neither I am criticizing Shah Rukh or saying
Aamir is better (actually, he is!) but this whole extorting money from
entertainment hungry masses, achieving 200 crore target and self-proclaiming
that a movie is all time best, is an idiotic method. It’s not correct. It’s like
promising cashew nut and realizing you just got peanuts for the same price and
the person is who made you fool, enjoys it! In fact asserts it proudly!
I have no idea who is to be blamed for this ridiculous
trend. SRK is a decent actor and has lot to experiment (which he wouldn’t), but
at the end of the day if making movies has just become a business then Shah
Rukh Khan has achieved Ph.D. and he deserves respect for that.
But if someone would ask me what was his finest movie I
would have to really think hard. I would say recently, Chak De and all time fav
- Kabhi Haan Kabhi Naa (all time classic, better than DDLJ)
I feel sorry and petty for Indian audience, but we (taste in
fine, entertaining yet sensible movies) have no right to criticize people who
love movies that usually appeal to people with low IQ.
We understand that Bollywood is going through a rough phase
and these rotten 2 hour video rakes in 100 crores in one weekend, that does not
imply that people don’t want to appreciate brilliance like Bhaag Milkha Bhaag,
Rang De Basanti, Lage Raho Munna Bhai, Udaan, My Name is Khan etc. but if you
try to substitute that with spoof and expect us to get content, then BOLLYWOOD
craps, you better ready steady po!
